It was the first research paper I ever wrote.
I used the card catalog in the Pleasant Grove Junior High school library to find books
(using the dewey decimal system)
about being homeless.
I am sure that my carefully gathered facts from outdated, not peer reviewed journals and books are long past outdated (That was 19 years ago. . . . but that is beside the point).
Now I am homeless.
sort of.
I have numerous houses where I can sleep, shower, eat and put my stuff.
They just aren't MY home.
Who knew that you could get so attached to a piece of land and a few walls and cupboards.
I did.
It is hard moving.
Not physically hard (because I am so tough).
Emotionally hard.
Lonely hard.
Reflective of the life you have built for yourself kind of hard.
My house was built out of lumber and a few thousand nails and screws and paint and drywall and lots of labor. It was transformed into a home by each one of you.
The friends and family members who shared their love with me by celebrating, visiting, cleaning, decorating, stopping and always being right by my side.
The presidencies I served in that held meetings, filled with the spirit.
The YW who treated my home with respect and admiration.
Everyone whose laughter and tears, successes and failures, heartbreak and joy, but most of all spirit made my house a home.
President Thomas S. Monson said:
"A home is much more than a house built of lumber, brick, or stone. A
home is made of love, sacrifice, and respect. We are responsible for the
homes we build. We must build wisely, for eternity is not a short
voyage. There will be calm and wind, sunlight and shadows, joy and
sorrow. But if we really try, our home can be a bit of heaven here on
earth. The thoughts we think, the deeds we do, the lives we live not
only influence the success of our earthly journey, they also mark the
way to our eternal goals."
Soon I will be moving and forming a new life and home in Oregon.
It is exciting moving.
To be starting a whole new phase of life.
Anxious
Looking forward to a whole new phase of life.
A time when I won't be homeless.
And home will hold a deeper meaning then it ever has before because home will be filled with people I love. Again.
People who will
laugh with me
cry with me
learn with me
and love me.
It will be not "my home" but "our home"
Two little words never sounded so good. Truly, it will be Heaven on Earth.
5 comments:
I am so excited for you, Amber!!
Breaks my heart every time I look across the way and see your empty home. Also - you did not mention choir rehearsals. Because, let's face it. That's the coolest/most important thing you've done with your home.....
Made me teary eyed---I've left two homes behind--one after 23 years and one after 8 years. It is really amazing how attached you get to "spaces" that feel comfortable. Thanks for sharing. We all relate!
Even though it is hard to leave your home behind, I am happy for you and the new home you will have! Good luck with all that you do.
We had some amazing times in that house of yours - admittedly I'm pretty sure I might have cried once or twice when talking to you about stuff. Talking about boys and my problemos. Yeah, and remember that one day when we ran [your] errands together? And we bought chicken garlic pizza with no onions and extra tomatoes? Oh my gosh, I think I might start crying because I'm going to miss you so much. Can we do something before you get hitched and I never see you again!!! Gah!!! Or maybe you could come down for my mission farewell next summer? That would be fun. But I don't know - let's plan a time BEFORE you leave and we'll do something exciting - even though it won't be in your [past] home. And practicing the piano all the time in your house... yeah, I'm gonna miss that too. Oh man oh man... too many good times. I miss you even more after thinking about all of this. Thanks a lot!!! :'( Love you Amber <3
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